This story will be nothing more than an analogy for most of us, but I believe that the power of the story is in its very strength as an analogy. It was shared with me by my girlfriend (let’s call her Eve), who felt that this was the truest way to determine if you were compatible with someone; and though she shared it as a warning of something no couple should do (unless they were brave as hell), I took it as a challenge.
We were on a lake in the mountains of Oregon when she told me this story. She was on her paddle board, and I was in a kayak. Since we both had limited experience on our “flotation devices” we were both enjoying the adventure thoroughly. As we paddled over towards one shore, she chose to tell the story of a canoeing adventure with her ex-husband. …
Ok, I’m not perfect (duh), and I’m not here to attack men, or put women on a pedestal, or any other action that’s going to justify or vilify anyone in an argument. But what I am going to do is make a case for what I believe is one of the BIGGEST causes of conflict and ultimate failures in relationships — broken communication (or the perception thereof).
What!? So you mean to say that you’re going to sit there and discuss the same thing that every other bloody relationship “guru” is talking about!? Yup.
Go ahead guys, just nod along… you can do it… you do it all the flippin’ time. …
That I would wake, this day, to the clamor of armor and hooves;
The screams of men living, fighting, dying.
The suffocating heat and dust, stirred to bloody violence by human intolerance.
That I would wake, this day, and wish that I had not.
The heathens encroach on our camp.
They come on foot, and mounted on great wooden steeds.
They scream, and yell, and bleed.
Wait… why are they bleeding? Shit.
In truth, it is known, that every day is a battle of sorts.
Ever rages the battles of life,
Many are lost, some are won.
Yet the day begins anew with breaking dawn.
And in the end, the victor be declared by how we leave this world.
Now onward… To figure out why my little heathens are bleeding.
Then — Coffee.
— Mathew B.
“I wonder if she likes me…”
“Why is he acting like that?…”
“He’s 34, single, no kids… what’s wrong with him?…”
“I better not text. I need to give her space… Lead her on…keep it interesting”
“Oh god. Another D*** pic… I give up.”
Alright, so here it is, dating after 30 is hell. You’ve passed your prime years, if you want children, you’re going to be at least 50 when they move out, and you’ve likely been through a lot already. When you enter a new relationship at this age, your bringing baggage and preconceptions galore to the table; and the chances are really high that your date is too. For women it can be downright scary to date after 30. …
There are times when we all need a little boost, and there are absolutely times when the world can seem cold and unforgiving. In fact, I need to make an integral concession at this point. There are undoubtedly conditions of the human mind that fall outside of the scope of my recommendations. Sometimes the mental health of an individual is beyond their control; but for a massive percentage of the global population, I firmly hold the following to be true. No matter what you’re going through; divorce, death, bankruptcy, loneliness, homelessness, even persecution, or a long string of any number of other tragedies — you DO NOT have to be unhappy. …